Wednesday, August 17, 2011

My Appendix

Dear Appendix,

It's about time you got off this ship. Look, my body doesn't give free rides to organs that don't pull their weight. If you don't believe me, just ask my extra kidney. On a Monday I heard I didn't need two - on a Tuesday I pulled that sucker out. When I found out I could live with one lung, I sent the right one packing.

So am I glad you started screaming, making you presence known, buckling my abs? Yes, yes I am. I was tired of pulling your lazy butt through my life, anyway. Your infection just expedited your eventual exit. You're like a little brat at Disneyland, crying on vacation. Hey little brat, we didn't have to take you on this trip - in fact, we'd be enjoying ourselves more if you weren't here. Don't think for one second we need you; you're an expendable parasite.

Same goes for you, organs. So you better get with the program because this train waits for no one.

Sincerely,

My Body
1 of 3 scars that almost look like tribal tattoos
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24 comments:

  1. DB StewartAugust 17, 2011 at 10:11 AM

    Whoa. My spleen is shaking.

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  2. garrettAugust 17, 2011 at 1:41 PM

    do the testicles get an exemption?

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  3. j. littlejohnAugust 17, 2011 at 1:54 PM

    Dear Garrett,

    Yes.

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  4. NubianAugust 17, 2011 at 7:21 PM

    Anyone want two ovaries?

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  5. Maggie Asfahani HajjAugust 17, 2011 at 9:16 PM

    I found you through Gypsy in My Soul, and am very glad! Recover quickly, and such.

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  6. Miranda HardyAugust 18, 2011 at 2:40 AM

    I'm sure your testicles are very happy about that! lol

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  7. karensomethingorotherAugust 18, 2011 at 6:12 AM

    you had to get your appendix out?! Did they make you try to jump up and down first? Apparently if you can't do a 'jumping jack' that's a big sign that it's more than just a tummy ache.

    Add GALLBLADDER to the throw-away organs pile.

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  8. KelleyAugust 18, 2011 at 7:50 AM

    Darn organs, trying to get a free ride...Ugh. lol. <3 a new follower

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  9. msmariahAugust 19, 2011 at 8:59 PM

    This is too funny!

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  10. SylarAugust 20, 2011 at 8:59 PM

    nice post
    +follow

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  11. Julia, the Thanksgiving GirlAugust 21, 2011 at 12:10 AM

    You seriously only have one kidney and one lung now? Anyway, these scars do looks like some sort of a tattoo :) Maybe you should consider coloring them in lol

    Great idea for a blog too, I love the positivity!!

    P.S. Thanks for your kind words about my blog!! :)

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  12. JaseAugust 21, 2011 at 5:30 AM

    A really very interesting read! I hope you keep updating us with more info!

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  13. Come At Me BroAugust 21, 2011 at 11:18 AM

    This is great!

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  14. DouglasAugust 21, 2011 at 12:58 PM

    I'm keeping all my organs for now. You never know when they might come in handy.

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  15. Star TraciAugust 21, 2011 at 5:29 PM

    It's all about downsizing. In this economy, who can afford to keep organs that aren't contributing to the whole.

    :-)
    Traci
    www.astarinmyownuniverse.com

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  16. MilkyAugust 21, 2011 at 6:08 PM

    I have that exact scar man! In the middle of my belly just under my ribs. Got it after I had my gallbladder out ;/

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  17. A Beer for the ShowerAugust 22, 2011 at 6:13 AM

    Maybe that's what my brother-in-law should have done, was write a letter. His exploded in his body. And somehow he didn't die. Apparently that's instant death.

    The appendix is like the terrorist bomber of the organ world. Take your jihad somewhere else, you stupid, useless organ.

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  18. LeoviAugust 23, 2011 at 2:54 AM

    Really beautiful and demanding letter.

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  19. nowaysjAugust 23, 2011 at 7:47 AM

    I say go for more scars.

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  20. Theresa MilsteinAugust 23, 2011 at 1:24 PM

    Wait, did you get your appendix or kidney out? I hope you're feeling better.

    P.S. I'm in no rush to get rid of an ovary or kidney. Mine are NOT on notice.

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  21. Life, Liberty and AccountabilityAugust 23, 2011 at 9:09 PM

    now you need a barbed wire tattoo around the scar

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  22. Caitlin @ Candyfloss & PersieAugust 23, 2011 at 10:30 PM

    hahah, very poignant and moving. I haven't had trouble with my Appendix but my guy friend's burst and he has a scar just like that plus he said it was the worst pain he's ever felt.

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  23. my day in a sentenceAugust 24, 2011 at 3:06 AM

    Lol, that really looks like a tattoo. :D
    Following and supporting, mate! :)

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  24. UnknownAugust 31, 2011 at 11:06 AM

    I'm just seeing this post, made me laugh out loud! Thanks for going through so much pain so that you could write this. (I'm sure that's why you did it, right?)

    Speaking of brats at Disneyland, the summer's over so now half of those brats will be gone. Yay!

    ~ Angela
    grahamandangela.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete

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