Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Epicanthic Folds


Dear Epicanthic Folds,

I wish my eyes had you.

Why:

1. Sleep. I have a hard time falling asleep. It's called insomnia. It's the worst disease ever -- with all the other diseases they tell you to get some rest... with insomnia, it's not so easy. If my eyes were already naturally closer to being shut, things would likely be a lot easier for me. I'm guessing.

2. Positive Stereotypes. Is there a race with more positive stereotypes? Asians are smarter. Asians are good at math. Asians are good at Dance Dance Revolution. Okay, DDR isn't really a positive stereotype, but still, it's not that bad.

3. Karaoke. It wouldn't seem so weird that I do kind of like Karaoke.... at least watching it.

Sincerely,

My Eyes


Human Tetris has nothing to do with this letter. Nothing

13 comments:

  1. Dude, you are damn funny and you post only once a week. You should post more.
    This post, what should I say? extremely racist?
    I am not sure whether you have insomnia or not, but definitely need a pill for this yellow fever?
    Please watch Luch Liu movies for 7 days a week and take acupunture treatment if the condition worsens.

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  2. Dear j. littlejohn
       I find your letters quite amusing.
                Sincerly Bersercules.
    P.S. the video was quite funny too!

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  3. Jon Gosling thanks you for this.

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  4. Asian people do carry the burden of two of the worst stereotypes of all, though.
    I didn't know there was a word for the eye thing.
    What about Eskimos? They have the epicanthic fold and there's no stereotypes about them at all.

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  5. I feel sorry for folks with insomnia (my wife included), and am thankful that I can fall asleep walking up stairs.

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  6. I'm not even gonna pretend I didn't just wikipedia the shit out of Epicanthic Fold. Educating AND entertaining. Now I just need to find a way to drop it in everyday conversation without being racist to make myself sound suuuper smart and not at all like a white supremacist. "Oh, you don't know what an Epicanthic Fold is? Oh you poor small minded person!" Bwah ha ha.

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  7. @Pickleope, no Eskimo stereotypes? Let's begin brainstorming.

    @slamdunk, be careful, a baby is about to fall out a window in your picture

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  8. @Gia, yes, use this is conversation. It will fit right in.

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  9. from what you described... i feel totally non-asian! except for the karaoke, i love it! (oh we'll except if it's the neighbors singing O_o)

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  10. Ha! Yes, please. Post more often. And as for the video, I think I found the theme for my next birthday party!!! I think I have time to get lawyers on board to craft the release from liability forms...

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  11. Or you could just be from Lappland, they tend to have it too. Too funny. I mean, I'm all for anything to help with my karaoke skills.

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  12. I was a victim of insomnia for almost 2 years. Okay, it was my wife who actually had the insomnia, but I negatively affected by it too.

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  13. those Japaneses tv programs are quite funny because the things that they have to do to make money. they know how to do them.

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