Wednesday, November 16, 2011

People Flipping Out About Christmas Intruding on Thanksgiving

Dear "No Christmas in November" Fanatics,

Calm. Down.

Why do you care if somebody listens to Christmas music in November? Or if a store decorates for Christmas right after Halloween? What does it matter if people want a season instead of a day?

What do you want them to do? You want them to dedicate their Novembers to Thanksgiving? You want them to have a tree in the house and throw a bunch of dead turkeys on it? Thanksgiving is a day. It's meant to be just a day. It's not a season! We're all grateful one day of the year and then we can go back to our decadent, over-the-top gift-giving and commercialism that Christmas alone provides us. The holidays have to adjust to the times. Gratitude is out and surprising-your-spouse-with-a-new-Lexus-with-a-red-bow is in.


Bam. That's a holiday I can get behind for more than month. Step up your game, Thanksgiving. If you don't want to get run over, stay off the railroad tracks.

Look, if you want people to respect Thanksgiving, make Thanksgiving earn it. I'm talking about Thanksgiving not just being a day I wake up, eat too much and watch television -- I'm talking about a day with a mythical fat man who comes down the chimney. I want a bunch a good Thanksgiving movies, including at least one with Will Ferrell. I want thanksgiving music and I want more football games, more food, and yes, some presents.

I want a holiday that does more than simply remind me of when pilgrims gave the Native Americans small pox. "Here Indian, please accept this blanket I just sneezed in," I can hear a little pilgrim boy saying. That's not a stocking-stuffer, that's a death sentence.

Sincerely,

The Christmas Spirit

18 comments:

  1. I always thought it was about time Santa upgraded his stocks. The wooden train and rocking horse bit was so last century. You got that last year too, right?

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  2. santa is an old ginie... he's too fat to fit in a lamp or a vase so he has to climb down the chimney ^_^

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  3. I think people don't like it because Christmas music is annoying and repetitive, thus, to start playing the same 5 songs for two months, it's like listening to top 40 radio. And no one wants that. Maybe if we made the turkey more of a fun, mystical character?

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  4. Christmas in November doesn't bother me. Christmas before Hallowee? Yeah, kinda.

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  5. And, that would be Halloween.

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  6. "Bam." = hilarious! Well said.

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  7. I think people hate the music in the stores cause they have to work in the store all day! My girlfriend has to listen to christmas music all day at here work and it drives her and her coworkers crazy! (the songs repeat every 3 and a half hours!)

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  8. To Bersercules and Pickleope, I agree the music may be the problem here. However, you have both described an anti-Christmas music platform instead of a pro-respecting-Thanksgiving platform... which is my main target here. However, this makes me wonder if more of these so-called "it's-too-early-for-Christmas" types are fundamentally opposed to Christmas and simply promoting Thanksgiving to cover their Christmas rage.

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  9. I'm entirely a "No Christmas until after Thanksgiving" freak. The more the Christmas season encroaches on my year, the less Christmas I seem to be able to handle; almost to the point of wanting to punch every elf I see. I mean I like a creepy old fat man in a red coat that reverse burglarizes your house and preys on little children as much as the next biped, but I can only handle it from "Black Friday" through Christmas day. During this very specific period, I am the biggest ugly Christmas sweater wearing, carol singing, cheer bringing person this side of the North Pole.

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  10. What is wrong with you? Are you a business man? November is "christmas cleaning" month for stores and places of business.
    Do you know the meaning of thanksgiving, blackfriday,cybermonday? it is 4 days and a month.
    You are a comedian. Say you have lot of one-liners about iphone 4 and after a year you cant make jokes about iphone4 and hence you pick a day and get rid of all your one-liners from your jokes recipe box on the special day with fancy name "black friday" , so that you can fill your recipe box with jokes about iphone 5. Everyone should have time or month dedicated to have iphone 4 jokes shoved down the throat before they are done and buried forever.
    (I should have become a teacher, I would have pushed out lot of Einsteins from my classroom to the world)
    And personally I dont want to see red,nutcrackers, bells and stars already in November. I would love turkeys, indians and those pilgrims and brown for a while after halloween orange period.
    And I can handle holynight and jinglebell songs, "baby jesus", "virgin mary" songs in November is too much for me.

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  11. Dear Meandmythinkingcap,

    How dare you tell me what to put in and out of my "jokes recipe box" -- that's my own business and not yours. I mix my jokes in my kitchen in my own way. Perhaps you are right, people do deserve a time to have "iphone 4 jokes shoved down the throat" -- but I can't say one way or the other because I truly don't think this analogy is working or making sense. However, I am very grateful you stopped by, and your comment has just made my day.

    Also, because you asked, I not only don't know the meaning of cybermonday, I have never heard of it and doubt I ever will.

    James

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  12. You dont have recipe box/storage for your jokes, you should have some real memory builtin. Maybe that is why I can never be a comedian anytime :(
    "I truly don't think this analogy is working or making sense" - Then I am a bad teacher ;) I tried to insist that we need entire November month and thanksgiving isnt just a day event. And thanksgiving is nowdays , more about clearing up the shelves to line up christmas new toys and gifts and less about turkey and family dinner. And blackfriday isnt leftover day for food, but to nightout to pickup all the leftover junks in stores.

    And about movies, after seeing easter movies and stuff, I dont even wanna go there. Thanksgiving without movies - I am thankful for :)

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  13. Well, as far as making Thanksgiving earn respect goes, Tom the Turkey leaves presents in my shoes on Thanksgiving Eve every year. That counts, right?

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  14. Thanksgiving? Giving thanks? Appreciation?

    What are you talking about?

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  15. Thanks for visiting The Chubby Chatterbox. I think your blog(s) are great and I'll be back for more. I don't really have a problem with either Thanksgiving or Christmas, but let me know when you tackle the worst one of all--Valentine's Day!

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  16. When it comes to X-mas, I think it's about time Mrs Santa took over. I never much liked the idea of sitting on an old man's lap. As for people wanting a season instead of a day, I don't see the problem, really. Let people have fun, but don't get lured by commerce too much.

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  17. Loved this! I agree, Thanksgiving needs to bring it. Otherwise it's just a lame pre-show for the true star of holiday commercialization.

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  18. We should just move thanksgiving to another month, it just gets in the way of our glorious Christmases.

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